Jacob Parker
Giant
When he debuted America in 1996 the scales finally tipped at 679 pounds.
………..49 stone.
………..We needed a giant, the promoter said.
6 feet 11 inches. Giant Haystacks. Renamed ‘Loch Ness’ for WWF.
………..Snarling. Snaggle-toothed. Lumbering penguin-footed.
From behind he looked like an old man.
………..Saw off Jim Duggen though – ‘I’ll challenge any wrestler in the world.’
………..Had his eyes on Hogan too – ‘Not good enough to beat me.’
His daily diet consisted of
………..21 pints of milk, 8lbs of sausages, 10 large loaves, 2 edam cheeses, and more.
Took all three seats on a plane.
………..His home – all specially reinforced furniture.
Behind the pantomime, Martin Ruane. Kind, intelligent, deeply religious man. Devoted to his
wife, Rita (5ft2”). Met as teenagers. Three sons.
He’d done every kind of work you’d expect of a big man cast in his type:
………..Timber factory, tyre firm, heavy goods vehicle driver, night club bouncer.
Before wrestling.
………..Where he let his form define who he was seen to be. Learned to play the villain by not saying much at all. Cautioned to one-word answers. To hide his gentle nature. The politeness in his bones.
………..Absorbed all that hate – the booing, jeering, spitting.
We needed a giant.
………..‘I like to drive wherever I can,’ he said. ‘The car is my thinking place. I work it all out there. I’m a loner. I don’t need friends.’
………..But there was Thatcher, McCartney, Sinatra. Even the Queen was a fan.
More circus than sport, the doubters said.
………..Injuries real enough though. Dislocated ribcage. Broken fingers. Lacerations.
And then the ex-rugby player, the magnificent King Kong Kirk – heart attack in Great Yarmouth Hippodrome after a hideous Big Daddy belly-flop.
Not for fortune either.
………..At his peak Haystacks was only clearing £600 a week.
Then axed from ITV.
………..Debt collector. Car salesman.
………..And finally, lymphoma.
………..………..Out for the long count at 52.
Gone now, the big men.
………..Mick McManus. Danny Lynch. Big Daddy. Len Britton.
And your dad too. A big man as well. He was always there, you said. His frame.
Stature.
His body. That’s what you remembered.
………..Physical presence.
He grounded your swirling family. The anchor for all you unwieldy, long-haired girls
………..flapping around him. He adored that.
………..Then an ill big man. Grounded to his armchair now. Watching wrestling with his
four daughters nestling round him pulled in as you watch this unbelievable
act unfolding before you – Haystacks in the 6th round with Kendo Nagasaki.
………..His greatest rival. ‘My most formidable opponent. A wrestler to be in
awe of.’
………..And Haystacks sure enough by the 6th has been destroyed.
Nagasaki has laid everything into this huge, now unconscious form. Unimaginable
suffering:
………..People’s elbows. Pile drivers. Sleeper hold. Three astounding top-rope flops.
And in what is meant to be the final pin on the last count Haystacks breaks
the hold
………..and now
………..………..begins to rise
as you watch spellbound this giant rising from the canvas, out from all of that ………..………. .incredible hurt his great weight lifting hauled
……. ….hulked first one knee then the other pushing grounding up up
and all of you believing despite everything that something like this
………..something so huge so unbelievable might just be possible
that there was somebody who could withstand such pain and still get up
………..standing now
………..his whole magnificent form risen
………..and Nagasaki frantic
………..………..not knowing where to run
………..………..………..from this hideous miracle.
Jacob Parker lives in London and teaches in a sixth form college. His short fiction has also featured in Structo, Open Pen, MIR Online, Litro, The Interpreter’s House, and others.
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